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-Past-

The mirrors that once reflected sunlight,
Are now mere shards and covered with dust...

The windows that once let one see the beautiful outside world,
Are now broken in pieces showing a blackened world of pain...

The books that once let one be swept away to magical places,
Are now torn and scattered amongst the filth on the floor...

The beautiful paintings of landscapes of rolling hills and waters,
Are now covered by heavy canvas never to be seen again...

The door that once let one out to the warmth of people,
Is now shut and locked behind you...

This room that once belonged to a happy child,
Is now a mere place of misery and hate...

This room which was once mine,
Is now a place which haunts me day after day...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Religion dominates the world,
and yet no one has faith.
People push you to their church,
and beg you to pray to something none-existant.
Fuck that, have faith in yourself!
No God or Goddess can top your own power!
They hold nothing above you,
and will never be any purer than you!
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
People, you people
people who always taunt and tease,
you wish you were the only ones
and didn't have to share the world...
But there is more people than you in the world,
and you'll always have to share.
I hate people like you,
you people all suck.
You people never care,
you are never concerned.
Well screw all you fuckers!!!
You did nothing but put me down...
I'll always be better than you!!
And not even God will save your souls...
Fuck you, and your bullshit.
I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Feeling cheap and a little used
Only by myself have I been abused
Let him take me places, I shouldnt have been
And I cannot say I wont do it again
Only one hurt in the process was me
A huge stain on my pride that just wont leave
Love was found for all the wrong reasons
I should of just let him know I was only teasing
Now I sit here waiting for a miracle of amnesia
I dont want to hear myself ever say again, "Whatever will please ya"
By my own damn standards, this just aint me
I never thought of myself as a mans property
All my reservations and instincts blown to dust
For an hour or so of nothing but lust
I am no longer little miss innocent
My feelings of security are suddenly absent
One look at me and you will say 'pathetic'
Maybe instead you'll all be unsympathetic
I wont accept pity, for I did this by choice
And maybe next time I'll learn to listen to that little voice
Just learn from me, and do not be vulnerable
For my crimes, I am the only one accusable...

Jillian M. Fougerousse
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I still look at pictures of you and I

And I smile through my tears

I suppose its easy to let go

When you are the one officially letting go

I remember the first time I held your hand

And you looked at me and smiled

No it wasnt I love you, but it said it all

Standing outside your house,

Where we had our very first kiss

Did I care you were sick? No

Down in my basement

We used to claim we were watching movies

I dont remember watching a single one for long

Wearing your varsity jacket always made me feel special

Even if you forced me to put it on, because I was being stubborn

 

The day I heard what was said

I didnt believe it at first

Yeah, we had our problems,

But I swore they werent that bad

I was trying to fix them all the time

But it never fully worked

You said you loved me the day before

How could that change in 8 hours?

Now I will do anything to see you

Even though it hurts like hell

To hear your voice

To feel your touch

Maybe Im obsessed

Perhaps Im addicted

But you made this way through your love

I never thought that would end

And maybe all good things do

After this all, you still gave me that necklace

I wont take it off, I'll wear it to the grave

Whether that is then or now

Ill probably never stop loving you

And will take forever to let go

But maybe youll come back to me

Because I am so alone, and empty

Why?

Push Away
 
I'm way too scared now
Please don't say those words, how...
Did it come down to this?
Not much more than friends
Thats where I wanted to end
But I'm too afraid,
I have to push you away
 
*Chorus*
I'll build these walls higher than you can climb
Solid enough, no one can read my mind
Not going to have my heart broken
No pain left as a token
I'll wrao barbed-wire around my soul
So no one can ever know
 
Don't make me use these same old lined
The useless babble standing tests of time
I know you want to say that three word vow
But I just dont believe you somehow

*Chorus*

Boys your age just don't understand
To say "I love you" doesn't make you a man
Mindless words lead to a broken heart
So if you're only knee deep, please don't start
There is much more to a girl than lips and legs
There lies a mind and soul and a heart that begs
For TRUE love!!

*Chorus (x2)*

{Spoken}
I don't believe you
Don't tell me "I love you"

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